Writing is Masochism

Writing for pleasure is code for, I’m into masochism. There is a lot of joy and happiness when you see a finished piece is a big fat lie. An orgasm lasts longer than that fleeting moment of joy. I’m proud of my work that has been published, but I always want to do better, or […]

I wonder

I wanted to write poems about her. I wanted to describe how she was like a rajnigandha flower, mellow yet intense. Her beauty was sublime, and when she smiled, she always held back. I wanted to describe her long beautiful hair, the dramatic turns, head nods, eye rolls, and expressions. But I can’t write poems about anymore […]

Run

I left behind my torn Kolhapuri They wore out and I needed to Run. From the monsters crawling out Of every happy memory I made. Now I stand here waiting for a new beginning That seems to be falling in place Naturally. Maybe my monsters weren’t actually in my head.

Losing it

“I wouldn’t be surprised, In the middle of the night, to Find Vinay watching me in my room. I’d just say “Go home Vinay, it’s creepy.”” And she laughed loudly at me, then repeated it To everyone around me. We are… were friends, I tried many times to be Friendly, And not creepy. “You’re so […]

Middle name: Second thought

I have second thoughts about everything, every step I take, every move I plan and sometimes even about eating. I don’t know what it means to not doubt my actions and just proceed with a thought. I’m not impromptu, never did anything spontaneous, and living everyday already feels too spontaneous to do anything else. Some classic second thought moments […]