Unconditional

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Something from the Archives

It’s been a while and I’m confused.
I don’t know what I want anymore. Is true love really out there ?
I sound like a stereotyped 16 year old girl, and the 16 year old girls I know are either worried about their exams, colleges or what they want from life or the meaning of their life.
I  know I want love. Love, that’s unconditional like the Katy Perry song. But is it truly out there? Because I have met people (young and some a little older) who make my heart race and others who’ve made my heart skip a beat or two.
I remember. The wild sex, the touch that sent shivers up my spine and the breath that tickeled my neck and always went down. It was passionate, hot, crazy, sweaty, and the salivating tongue like the fingers explored my body.
It was wild and wonderful, but after the exciting climax I wanted to run. Run from the bed that I was desperate to get on to.
The sweat and bodily fluids seemed disgusting, the naked body was uncomfortable, I had to wrap myself and hide it.
After the amazing sex I want to be OK, ok to hold tight and cuddle. Cuddle without cringing or counting down in my head when it would be polite enough to say I want to leave.

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